Dear reader,
This letter might hurt. I am warning you now, so that you may prepare yourself for what is to come.
I am a horrible person.
I was before I met Christ.
And after that amazing and life-altering event happened I am still a wretch apart from God’s Grace and Truth.
That is how I will preface this story…
I started working at the local daycare here in the lovely town of Mount Pleasant (Sounds fake doesn’t it?) about three months ago now. I want to bring you back to the beginning.
I started out my day as I normally would. Go into the classroom and prepare the games and crafts that I would plan for the kids beforehand.
As I was preparing myself my boss walked through the door. “Hey, I just wanted to give you a heads up that we’re short-staffed today, so I am going to move some kids around and you’re going to get ____. (I can’t share the kid’s name here, but for story’s sake let’s call him Carl.)
“You’re going to get Carl.”
I had mixed emotions about this kid. No one liked him, a majority of the staff and the kids quite literally would loathe his existence if he was near them. I knew that I was to love and serve him just like any other kid in this place, but I had to admit I had watched him with other people and I knew he would make my day a lot harder to get through.
I did my best to prepare myself to face the day, and prepare for the battle that it was sure to be.
I still wasn’t ready.
Now if you know me at all, you know I come from a large family of 11 kids in total. I have worked with camps, Sunday school classes, and youth groups for the majority of my life.
My patience has been well-refined over the years.
BUT. I still wasn’t prepared for Carl.
He is one of the most loving kids I have ever met. He is quick to give you a hug or ask if he can snuggle on your lap when he’s sad. He wants to help in every way that he can.
But won’t listen to you unless he wants to listen to you.
“Hey Carl, can we pick up our toys?”
“No, I don’t want to.”
“Hey Carl, we need to lay down and take a nap.”
“I can’t. I’m not tired.”
“Carl, can you please help me with this?”
“No. I’m doing this right now.”
Now. The first time he was with me He refused to do anything I asked him to.
EVERYTHING.
I cannot exaggerate this at all. Not one single thing.
I eventually lost my temper, I had to tag out with a different teacher and I went to my boss.
“I mean this in the kindest way, but I want him kicked out of this daycare.”
Yes. I did actually say this.
My boss looked at me and asked me to give it some time, and that eventually, the kid would warm up to me. I told her that the way He was acting prevented me from giving any other attention to any other kid because he required so much attention.
“Yep. I know. Just do your best.”
Boy oh boy was my heart rock solid that day.
I went into the restroom for the remainder of my break and laid everything out before God.
I wanted to be right. I gave God all the reasons that I thought I was justified in my thinking, and it felt as if He shook his head at me.
“Mitchell, you know that I view you no differently than I do this child. I expect you to do the same. Love him, serve him, lay down everything for him. Show him the same love I show you.”
Ouch. That cut deep. I couldn’t believe that I let myself get to that point, and yet that’s exactly where God brought me. He showed me myself, and he told me to love him as God loved him.
I don’t know if God has done this with you yet in your story, but you better hold on tight, it is meant to shatter your pride. If at any point you don’t want to love someone and you have a handful of reasons why you are still ultimately wrong.
Carl loves me.
Even when he is doing something he knows is wrong, he is quick to run to me and give me a hug and say “I’m sorry teacher.” Sometimes, but not all the time.
Again, when I do something wrong and run to the Father hoping that He’ll show me Grace and Mercy. How could I possibly hold back from Carl?
Working alongside this kid shatters me every time.
I must die to myself to work in this environment. These kids ask so much from me, and yet out of the love that Christ has given me I am compelled to give it to them.
Even Carl.
I urge you, to go and be with God today. Ask him to shatter your pride, and to humble you as you walk. Even when you do the one thing you know you shouldn’t, run to the Father, He will not turn you away.
He cannot.
He is the Best Teacher.
He is a good God.
Until next time,
-Your Fellow Teacher in Training, Mitchell
